Today’s workplace demands various kinds of technical expertise in order for professionals to move up the corporate ladder. But that’s not quite enough. One of the things that makes the great professionals stand out from the good or average ones is their ability to communicate, connect, and collaborate with others. In other words, their people skills.
Did you know that at the heart of
good people skills lies emotional intelligence?
What is emotional intelligence or EI, anyway? It’s the ability to process and manage your own emotions while also recognising as well as influencing the emotions of others. It's
all about being balanced.
And can emotional intelligence actually be used to hone your people skills at work? You betcha!
Here are 7 ways you can use emotional intelligence to boost your people skills at work.
1. Practice Self-Awareness
The very first step in understanding emotional intelligence is knowing who you are.
That’s because self-awareness means recognising our emotions, triggers, and behavioural patterns, and before they affect what we do.
Once you understand how you’re feeling, you can manage your responses in an effective way. Let’s give you an example: if you are feeling stressed out or too anxious before a meeting, you can always take a step back and take a deep breath, rather than snapping at one of your coworkers.
You can keep a daily journal to track your emotions, if it helps. Just pause during the day and ask:
“How am I feeling right now and why?”
By practicing self-awareness, coworkers will see you as a composed and thoughtful individual, instead of a reactive one.
2. Manage Your Emotions Proactively
We’re off to a good start already!
The next thing to focus on is self-regulation, which means controlling impulsive or spontaneous behaviours in order to manage stress in a healthy manner.
Have you ever noticed how people at work are usually drawn to those who are always
calm in the face of pressure? When you understand how to regulate your emotions, you can create a sense of stability within your team or among those you regularly work with.
You can build emotional self-regulation by taking short breaks at work or by practicing relaxing breathing techniques each time emotions run high. More importantly, strive to replace impulsive or knee-jerk reactions with considered and controlled responses.
This emotional intelligence skill will see others trusting you more. When people know that you’re not the kind of person who loses their temper or shuts down during tough circumstances, they will readily trust you, which is another point for improving people skills.
3. Listen with Empathy
Empathy isn’t just about hearing someone out, it’s the art of truly understanding things from someone else’s standpoint. It’s an incredible connector at the workplace.
Empathy is an important human attribute to consider when it comes to improving your people skills. When your coworkers feel heard, they are more likely to collaborate with you and support you. You end up building better trust and the likelihood of conflicts or disagreements is greatly reduced as well.
Listening with empathy and active listening are interconnected: making eye contact, nodding when appropriate, and quickly summarising what the other individual said to you. By asking open-ended questions, you can better understand the other person’s feelings and motivations.
Congratulations, your people skills just went up another notch! You are now seen as a more approachable and supportive person, who’s also a great team player.
4. Strengthen Your Social Awareness
Being socially aware in an office setting allows you to read the room quickly: understanding office culture, group dynamics, unspoken signals, and so on.
Misreading a room or situation, however, can often lead to strained workplace relationships. When you are socially aware, you can adjust your behaviour to match the mood or circumstances in a room – be it a brainstorming session with the team or a client meeting.
Build your social awareness at the workplace by paying attention to everyone’s body language and tone of voice. Observe how different team members respond in meetings. Then mirror their communication style where appropriate.
This helps you adapt to a room’s dynamics quickly, making coworkers feel valued and comfortable.
5. Communicate With Emotional Clarity
In addition to good communication skills, you also need to communicate in an emotionally intelligent way. This means expressing and articulating your thoughts clearly while being mindful of how your words, gestures, and tone might affect others.
Poor communication tends to cause misunderstandings and conflict. On the other hand, clear and empathetic communication ensures that your message is received as intended.
So rather than placing blame, use “I” statements, such as “I am concerned about this deadline”, rather than “you delivered this project late.”
Always balance assertiveness with kindness, and you’ll find that your coworkers will appreciate your honestly and respect your professionalism.
6. Use Emotional Intelligence in Conflict Resolution
There’s no way around workplace conflict, it’s bound to happen at some point, right? But the key differentiator is how you handle it.
People who have high emotional intelligence tend to
resolve conflicts constructively and in a way that strengthens relationships. This helps all parties feel respected.
Emotional intelligence plays a significant role in conflict resolution and it can be built by staying calm and avoiding taking sides. It’s important to listen to both parties’ perspectives and find common ground. Always avoid blame and focus on solutions only.
You just boosted another one of your people skills: you are now seen as a mediator and problem-solver, a crucial skill for leadership roles.
7. Cultivate Motivation - For Yourself and Others
While motivation stems directly from emotional intelligence, there’s more to it than just personal drive – it’s about uplifting and inspiring others.
Motivated employees create a positive environment. When you show enthusiasm and persistence, you encourage others to do the same.
Start by celebrating the small wins, not just your own but especially those of coworkers.
Be generous with sharing positive feedback and always keep the larger goal in mind (not just your monthly paycheck or climbing up the company ranks).
Cultivating motivation
helps you radiate positivity, making you a revered motivator and influencer in the workplace, thus, boosting your people skills.
Putting it all Together
While understanding how to use emotional intelligence to boost your people skills, you’ll have likely observed how each of the seven strategies complement each other:
- Self-awareness and self-regulation help you manage yourself.
- Empathy and social awareness help you connect with others.
- Clear communication, conflict resolution, and motivation transform those connections into lasting professional strengths.
By practicing these aspects of emotional intelligence daily, you’ll not only boost your people skills but also create a workplace environment that is more collaborative, respectful, and productive.
Final Thoughts: Emotional Intelligence as a Major Career Anchor
As technical knowledge in various fields continues evolving, emotional intelligence will always remain timeless. Organisations are increasingly valuing professionals who can communicate effectively, manage conflict gracefully, and inspire others.
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Whether you’re aiming for a leadership role, working in a team-heavy environment, or simply wanting to improve relationships at work, emotional intelligence gives you the edge.
By practicing these seven ways to use emotional intelligence, you’ll build better people skills—and with them, boost the success of your career.