A Woman’s Route To Being More Likable

Women need to be a lot of things! At any given time, a woman may need to be professional, nurturing, efficient, supportive and organized. As if that's not enough, today’s woman also needs to be likable. But what does that mean and how is it achieved?
In this article, we take a look at a woman’s route to being more likable and share with you some important tips for making it happen.

The Lowdown On Likability

“Likability” is a word which is bandied about a lot these days, whether it’s on social media or in a professional setting. So, what does it actually mean to be likable ?
That’s quite a wide question but it can be narrowed down to this - a likable person tends to be one toward whom others gravitate. In other words, someone who doesn’t annoy or bully or bore those around them. When it comes to likeability there’s a fine line between being somebody that others warm to - and being so bland that the word “likable” almost becomes an insult.

Or, if you want to go all official, the dictionary definition of likable is “pleasant and easy to like”.

How To Be More Likable

It’s easy to imagine that being likable is a mysterious characteristic that you either have or you don’t. But that’s not quite true. In fact, likeability can be a learned skill.
So here are a few easy but effective tips for becoming more likable:

Say it with a smile

While words are important, so too is our body language. And a smile can go a long way towards being likeable. No, we’re not suggesting that you walk around all day with a huge (maybe vacant) grin plastered across your face like some kind of Stepford Wife; far from it. But we are saying that if you don’t smile, you’re more likely to come across as severe and unapproachable.
And approachability is inextricably linked with likeability.

Show an interest

For a great many people, a favorite topic of conversation is themselves and, in fact, most of us will have a favorable response to someone who shows an interest in us. This can be as simple as asking somebody thoughtful questions about themselves and following up rudimentary questions with more detailed ones. For example; after asking somebody what they do for a living, following up by asking if they enjoy it and what brought them onto that particular career path. Much better than a non-committal grunt before you move on…

Cracking compliments

This can be a tricky one to master but, once you do, it will almost certainly pay dividends. The trick here is to not shower somebody with superficial compliments (love your dress, you look nice etc) but to use compliments sparingly but to great effect. A workplace example of this might be if a colleague is explaining a new system or action to you. A sincere and simply delivered “you really do have a talent for making a complex process easy to follow”.

Be a positive force

Few of us feel endlessly cheerful all of the time. Actually, it would be odd if we did. But having said that, you also don’t need to share all your problems and complaints with other people.
So although it's natural to look for support when something has angered or upset you, if you do this too often, you’ll soon become known as a drama queen or “a bit of a downer”.



Before sharing your woes with others, ask yourself a few questions:

• Will he / she be able to help ?
• Will telling them help me ?
• What outcome am I hoping for by telling him / her ?

In many cases, we’re sharing our problems simply to ‘vent’ rather than seeking a solution. This will often do no more than shift the burden to the other person. And sometimes they’ll resent you for it. Not a good idea…

Get the balance right

If you’ve succeeded at something, it’s only natural to want to tell others about it. There’s nothing wrong with that, as long as you get the balance right. After all, there’s a fine line between sharing and boasting, and the latter rarely wins any points in the likeability stakes.

A teaching moment

There’s an old saying by the Dalai Lama that goes, “When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know. But if you listen, you may learn something new”. When approaching somebody a good rule of thumb is to work on the assumption that this person may have something to teach you. This works well as it will automatically change your mindset to one of questioning and listening rather than simply waiting for your turn to speak.



A willingness - or even eagerness - to learn what somebody else has to teach is, in itself, a form of compliment that will very much endear you to them.

Being you - but better

When it comes to improving your likeability, the last thing you want to do is to change your personality and become a “yes man” (or should we say “yes woman”) in an attempt to endear yourself to others. In reality, this will usually tend to have the opposite of what you want, as people will assume that you’re weak or don’t have a mind of your own.
Instead, it's all about being aware of how you may come across to people around you, and then to tweak this behavior.

If you’re brave enough, you can always ask those closest to you about your strengths and weaknesses on the likability scale. But be careful because these can sometimes result in uncomfortable conversations.

Getting On Course For Likeability

These days, likeability is so important that many women choose to be proactive by taking an online course. This can be enormously helpful. If you’re interested, our own course doesn’t just teach you ways of being more likable, it helps you understand how it all fits together.

Whatever you choose to do, you’ll benefit a great deal if you take the time to invest in your future. You’ll see a real change: not just in how you relate to people, and get things done, but in getting a happier life into the bargain!

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